My spiritual guide has mentioned a few times that we all have deeply engraved childhood trauma to uncover and release.
I don’t remember precisely any specific childhood trauma; yes, I had an unhappy childhood, I have to say. But deep feelings of unworthiness and being unworthy of Love? Possibly, lots of specifics in my childhood, but I can’t remember what exactly could make those feelings of unworthiness so deep.
Where does that come from? I went back and back to the time I felt horrible about myself for the first time. I tried to remember my worst feeling about being who I am. I couldn’t say when it happened precisely because these underlying feeling has accompanied me always. Ever since I can remember.
When one feels a belief has been with us ever since we can remember, it must have been put there early.
I didn’t remember how trauma could have begun early in my infancy or childhood. Until I remember a day when I felt unworthy of the Love of God; more than a day, I remembered a sense, a notion, a feeling. I felt condemned with no possible redemption in Heaven or Earth. The mind of a child is impressionable.
I can firmly say that day, whether I was 3, 5 or 7 years old, I died. I died to Love with no remedy.
I don’t remember how old I was when I was told the story that killed me and set me on a sure path of seeking redemption through the perceptions and judgments of the ego. Which was that image of me; I started building when I could no longer love myself fully as it was apparent to me, superficially deep down, that God could not possibly love me. It was a day I deeply experienced separation. I needed a saviour. Someone who could be just me, alone and separate.
I’m not her! I screamed while I got into the works of building the most impenetrable image shield around me. Something bulletproof that would keep me apart from ALL. Due to the sheer terror of the separation I had established when I decided that God couldn’t love me because of what I was taught about myself.
Unknowingly, I was building what would keep me unaware of the Love of God inside me. I was building an image of an imagined self. Not a Real me but a picture of me, the ego.
It’s then easy to live as if we’d made ourselves based on this imagined self we build to protect and shield ourselves.
The Real Me, the Soul I Am, the infinite source of Light, Love and Power of Creation that I Am, was Created. The Light that expands from Divine Creator, Love. Love doesn’t need an imagined self to protect herself. I am not that image I built; it’s good to try and remember that permanently. I don’t need protection or shielding of any kind. God created me whole, perfect and Divine.
I didn’t know anything about the Real me when I was a child. Or, much better said, I knew in my Soul, but growing up, I was systematically programmed against this knowledge.
No one ever mentioned anything about the Divinity in me when I was a child. On the contrary. They did quite the opposite.
They talked about a woman who represented all women. I wasn’t a woman at the time yet, I was A little girl, but she was what I was destined to be: a woman.
Why did she represent womankind?
Because she was “supposedly” the first Woman and instantaneously, almost like magic, she became what woman “means” in human consciousness. If the mother of all mothers was like that, and I believed it, there’s absolutely zero way, zero chance, I, a young female child, could ever in my life, really and honestly think of myself to be any better than Eve, the mother of all mothers. That would be pretentious and arrogant, for a start.
They told me about Eve.
They told me she was responsible; she was the guilty one, the “evil” one, the one who lost paradise for us all. She is the reason why you might find things somehow unpleasant around here on Earth.
Furthermore, god was so angry about what happened that he made sure Eve, Woman, would remember her punishment and how that god was punishing her; she would remember her punishment every time she gave birth.
What about him? Wasn’t Adam responsible? He was only guilty of allowing his wife to make him eat an apple.
Adam’s punishment would be to get off his ass and go to work for a living.
All set!
Now that we are daring to discuss, isn’t Adam’s punishment very convenient for whoever is running things in the world, such as the economy? Maybe? For whoever had plans to enslave humanity?
- Relinquish Woman’s power by making her hate herself and feel there’s no good in her.
- Make the sheer evidence of her power to co-create with God painful.
- Put Man to work, make him an eternal enslavement volunteer and make it think that’s the normal thing to do.
Do you understand why I died? The day they told me what I did. What Woman did and her horrible punishment; yes, you can be happy about having a child but always know that god is punishing you with childbirth pain.
I couldn’t face god and the guilt at the same glance. To punish me so! All of us! he must be very angry.
Unknowingly, I faced the other way and walked in the direction opposite to God to take the way of the ego for self-preservation, a way that leads to death nonetheless.
But that is another story.
This is what happened to Woman: Lies
As told by liars, Eva’s story had made me feel forever unworthy, unloved, unwanted, persona-non-grata.
My believing the lies covered me away from the Love of God
That lie and more lies made me walk the Earth like seven demons, worthless whore. That has made Woman suck up and swallow as if she deserved it, every atrocity committed against her for aeons and counting.
I felt unlovable until I started to build a relationship with God within me;
When I look within me, there is no trace of the Eve that was fooled by a beast. There’s only Love. The Love of my Creator within me. The Love that I am. The Love that was always mine. I was busy ignoring the Love I am while building my ego, a self-made image of me to protect myself from the lack of Love I believed I deserved.
Then the veil began to fade. But the unworthiness feeling has persisted. Until now, until I faced the core of it.
I had to unearth this Truth to allow healing.
Sister, Mother, we were told a lie, and we believed it and deeply engraved it within our minds and psyche.
I know the story of “Bad Eve” is FALSE simply because the Truth doesn’t need explanation; it doesn’t have opposition. Any lie quickly shows itself as obvious trickery and vanishes instantly when looked upon in the Light of Truth.
The Truth is that The God I know who lives in me and is LOVE doesn’t have that kind of a sh*tty attitude. The Truth I know is that the Adam I know would take responsibility for whatever he does and not blame his wife. The Truth I know is that Eve would not be fooled by a beast. She wouldn’t lose her home and her garden that easily. She wouldn’t!
You know that too deep within. Because you know you, You Woman.
And the Truth is the stories in the Bible have been purposely manipulated and tampered with to read entirely differently from what actually happened by powers that were. For the purpose of control and enslavement of the human race.
It is time to face the facts.
Humans can only be enslaved voluntarily, preferably – for the deceivers – unknowingly. Who are the deceivers? They go back hundreds of thousands of years and have tried this delusional g- reset many times before. Look it up. However, what matters most is that their time is most certainly up.
Because You know the Truth.
This revelation begs the question: Within the false Adam and Eve story consciousness of humanity, where do you even begin to find or even try to search for the Divine Feminine consciousness in mankind?
Exactly!
This an unusual question which has never been asked before. Why?
Truth has been hidden from our awareness for aeons. It’s time we face it. All we need to do is seek Truth. Be brave! The Truth won’t bite; Truth enlightens. The Truth sets you Free.
Let’s come back to Truth, to Love and to Light.
We are one
Perpetrated Religious Lies and Confusion for the Purpose of Control and Manipulation
This argument clearly illustrates the Great Confusion surrounding Christianity. The confusion was manufactured by ways of deception and manipulation. “Christianity”
- Supposedly “Jesus’s teachings, which aren’t the very term “Christianity”, was made up by the perpetrators to hijack the influence Jesus had and use it for their greedy power and control-hungry purposes.
The people in this documentary are utterly confused; they are talking about a person whose Real Name they don’t know.
For anyone interested in the Truth, read or listen to “Jesus, My Autobiography” channelled by his chosen medium: Tina Louise Spalding